Floating
by Lovelaney
Summary: Please Review! Thanks! My bottom half was going numb – so were my fingers I noticed. I think I was in some type of shed. I could smell sawdust, gasoline – maybe from a lawn mower? It was musty, and extremely dark – not that the blindfold was helping much. Even though they were covered, my eyes filled with tears and my heart swelled. I just wanted him to find me.
1. Chapter 1

**It would be great if you let me know what you think! Hope you enjoy so far**

I was sitting on a milk crate I think. My bottom half was going numb – so were my fingers I noticed. I think I was in some type of shed. I could smell sawdust, gasoline – maybe from a lawn mower? It was musty, and extremely dark – not that the blindfold was helping much. Even though they were covered, my eyes filled with tears and my heart swelled. I just wanted him to find me, so we could both get out of here.

* * *

I was floating through school – everyone was. Not many people talked with each other, especially when I walked by them in the halls. The death of our most valuable point guard, my brother Jason, was still fresh in everyone's mind after the winter holiday break. The team wasn't going to state now unless their back up could 'figure out his shit quick.' I don't know what they were expecting me to do. My brother and I were close. Only one year apart, we were almost inseparable as kids, even growing up until he got closer with his basketball friends. I rarely saw him anymore… Well before he was gone. Some people thought I would lose it – end up in a crazy person's home or something. Other people I heard made bets on whether I would shave off my strawberry blonde hair, join a gang, or even quit school. People could be so dumb.

Most of the kids didn't know that Jason was my brother. He was the tall, tan, charming of course and handsome. The kind of guy most every girl wanted to date. I flittered my way around. Making friends with most everybody, I never got close enough to anyone to have a great friend (or more than that) relationship. I didn't know why, my parents just thought I was socially awkward. It wasn't that I was atrocious with my physical features either – I just liked to keep to myself, and I guess most people didn't like that. It was fine with me though, especially at a time like this. I could hear people murmuring Jason's name everywhere I went. I pulled my sweater tighter around me, feeling as if someone turned the AC on high inside my body. I walked through the doors of my culinary class grateful when I saw we were just going to be taking notes today. My chef nodded at me, trying to wear a warm smile. I couldn't believe people, how fake they could become when situations like this came about. I took a seat towards the back today and slapped my binder down on the table. People finished trickling in as the bell rang. Our chef stood at the front of the class room, clipboard in hand, which usually only meant one thing…

"Alright class, I hope you all had a nice time off from school," people murmured. I heard Jason's name come up time and time again. I was so glad I had no more tears to cry. He cleared his throat noticing he had said the wrong thing, "Well, anyway, I'm going to try something new this quarter – Seating chart. Alright now, come on everybody pick up your things and move out towards the sides of the room – yes you too John." People shuffled and moved their things. I felt like I was being starred at. He started with the back row, calling off names.

"Alright row one, in the back starting from the left I want Jenna, Leah, Ben, James, Heather, Carson," he paused waiting for them to settle, "Next to Carson will be Blakely," I took my seat, "And next to her will be Tynan. Okay, row two, starting right to left this time people!" Chef trailed off. I heard a few snide remarks from Jenna and Leah as Tynan took his seat next to me. He pulled out his seat jerkily and dropped his stuff onto the table. I didn't dare to look at him, but I thought I felt him staring at me. I pulled my sweater tighter around me, feeling self-conscious. At least he smelt good, not like blood like some people joked about. I glanced over at him; his face was turned in my direction. My face flared up and I quickly turned away. I couldn't even tell if he was looking at me or not, his long choppy black hair fell into his eyes. Leaning forward, I put my face in my hands as Chef started teaching – it was going to be a long third quarter.

"Now, I'm sorry to ruin your hopes and dreams and wishing that this was going to start out as an easy quarter after the break but we can't get off schedule. Therefore, life I had promised before the break, there will be a project," groans erupted from the class. Tynan pulled out a notebook from his back and flipped to a new page. His nails were painted black; _well at least it matched the rest of what he was wearing…_ Chains hanging off his black pants… He was wearing a looser dark blood red t shirt under his black hoodie… He was just so… Well yeah he was a total Goth. He pulled up his right sleeve so he could write. He wasn't as pale as I thought he would be though...

"Blakely," the whole class turned around to stare at me as Chef said my name. I looked up at him and my face turned red, "S-sorry Chef, I just got… I-it won't happen again,"

"Anyway, as I was saying," the class slowly turned back around, one by one, "Your quarter project. You must all be just excited. I've tried to make it fun, creative… You know how it is this time of year, if you get a project it better be an interesting one. This however is going to take some planning, and a partner. ONE partner people – and before you raise your hand, no, no groups. I've already made the rubric which is what I'm passing out to you all now," as he handed out the rubrics I started looking around for potential partners. Everyone was talking to each other, some already planning what they were going to do. Apparently we had to create a theme, recipe, and cook it and make enough for the class. It was at least a full weeks-worth of planning and doing. I could ask Seth, he was my last partner for English and it worked out well, I started to yell out to him across the room when Chef interrupted us, "Once again, sorry to crush your plans if you've made them already but – your partner for the project will be your table buddy. No exceptions, get acquainted, you have the rest of the period to do a little planning." Most people seemed okay with it except for Heather and Carson who dated last year… Wait… which meant I was with…

"So I guess that's you then," The voice was alien to me; I'd never heard him speak before. Tynan was staring at me again, or so I assumed, I still couldn't see his eyes.

"O-oh, yeah…" I had never felt more awkward in my life. Way to start out the new quarter, thanks a bunch Chef. He was writing down ideas already on his notepad. Most of them I noticed were Japanese dishes, just by their names.

"Well what about Italian? Everyone likes Italian food don't they?" I said it softly enough for him to hear. I felt intimidated talking to him.

"Oh so you can speak full sentences without stuttering? Good. That would've gotten annoying. And no, Italian is out. If you listen around that's what most people are going after. If you come up with something interesting let me know, otherwise just plan where we're meeting and cooking and before you know it we'll be out of each other's business." He threw his books back into his bag. He was not a pleasant person, and of course I was stuck with him till the project was over. He pushed back his seat, screeching it across the floor and went up to Chef. He said something to him and Chef looked over towards me, nodded and Tynan left. We had twenty minutes left in the class, and I had nothing to do. I had one of the highest grades in this class, and I knew I knew how to cook. People always complimented me on my food whenever we had to bring things in. I lifted my binders to slip into my bag and a little piece of yellow paper fluttered to the floor. It was a phone number and under it was written; _Let me know when you figure it out._ I stuffed it in my pocket and closed my eyes, waiting for the bell to ring.

Have you ever just sat somewhere staring out the window, listening to your music when suddenly a song comes on that just sends a billion pins and needles throughout your body? Like the tune and beat of the song sound exactly just like you feel? The rest of the day had flown by and I was now sitting on my window seat in my 'new' room. After my brother died, my family broke down into chaos. Not like I hadn't expected him to die, but I had seen it coming whether I liked it or not. But I didn't do anything about it. There was a light knock on the door and my pins and needles faded from my skin. My grandma popped her head in and I smelt warm banana bread waft through the door. She was always baking something, "I thought I would bring you a little something to eat. I put chocolate in it this time, makes everything seem a little bit better," she smiled a warm grandma smile and sat the plate on my desk. I thanked her as she clicked my door shut behind her. She had my same strawberry blonde hair, except it was short and was greying very quickly these days. My parents fled town a few days after my brother passed. They stayed long enough to arrange his memorial and funeral, put the house for sale, pack up, drop me here and left. I always thought if they would have done the same if I was the one who had passed instead of Jason – but I knew better. Parents will tell you they don't have a favorite child, but I think otherwise. They call and text once in a while, but I don't even know where they are. I don't really care to know either. I took a piece of bread from the plate and popped in in my mouth. For a moment I felt warm and happy. Little things like this I would have to take where I could get them.

I shut my computer, finally finishing my homework. Gran was already asleep and I heard little paws scratching at my door. My little German shepherd puppy bolted through the door as soon as I made a crack big enough for him to get through. He was a welcome present from Gran, and I named him Echo. As soon as I set him on my bed he nestled up in my pillows and fell asleep. I don't know how many times I would have killed to have been able to do that. I changed out of my school clothes and into my pajamas. I was just about to shut my eyes when the little piece of paper caught my attention. Tynan's number was still there, staring back at me in his swirly writing. I grabbed it off the ground, and before I knew what I was doing I entered the number for a new message in my phone. It was a simple message, _you pick._ Free of any emotion, including fear – except I was scared. I pressed send. I turned my phone to silent and put it back on the nightstand. It creeped me out knowing he has my number… he could track it, come through my window and kill me any second – I don't know how much more of a freak I could be. Somehow I fell asleep soon after that, not waking up to anything during the night.


	2. Chapter 2

**I think I have decided that there aren't going to be any angelic type figures in this story! Just two normal teens going through their lives, however, if you remember back to the last chapter with the flashforward there is something big coming up! Thanks for the love!**

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I dreamt of Tynan. I watched him as he shot my brother over and over as the dream reoccurred through the night. I couldn't move, talk, or scream. I sat there as he died and couldn't help him. I could have saved him. I woke up drenched in sweat and my comforter was in a heap on the ground. Echo was in his blanket on the floor. I know Tynan didn't kill my brother, but the fact that I even dreamt that put a new fear of him in my mind. I watched my brother die – but he didn't get shot. He killed himself, not intentionally though.

As soon as I closed my eyes again I was back on the cliff, sitting against the willow tree enjoying the strange warm weather for mid-December. We rarely saw snow in our small coast line California town. Jason had invited me along with him to hang out with his friends. They had just won a game and were all ready to celebrate, and the 'willow peak' was one of my favorite places. They were sitting around his friend Brandon's car. A couple of the guys brought their girlfriends, and the others brought the drinks, and the drugs. It was a common thing around our town and in our high school. None of the parents made much of a big deal out of it, unless someone did something stupid. Most everyone tried to keep out of trouble. By the time I had finished my girly wine cooler - I hate beer - the guys had downed a few six-packs. I was going to be the designated driver for sure. I liked to stay on the edge of whatever Jason invited me to, just watching. I find people interesting to watch. One of the guy's girlfriends, Izzy, was high as a kite and started feeling up one of the other guys. I didn't understand how some people could just let themselves go like that. Brandon keeps looking over at me, and when our eyes meet he winks. I could feel my face turn pink and look away. He was cute – but everyone knew him to get in anyone's pants he could. With a face and body like that, not many could resist. The sun was setting and the drunken group moved toward the side of the cliff, all sitting down hundreds of feet over the ocean, watching the sun set where the water met the sky. I just closed my eyes and leaned farther into the tree. It was relaxing. And then I felt someone's fingers trail down the side of my neck and shoulders. Brandon kneeled down beside me and put his lips to my ear, "You know," he slurred. He smelt of pot and beer, "I don't think your brother would mind much if I took you out sometime. When did you grow up to be so beautiful…" at his last words his lips closed around my earlobe, sending chills throughout my body. And they weren't good ones. I didn't know what to do. His hand had closed around my left wrist and his other was trailing down my side. I looked over at my brother, who was standing up to get a few more beers for his friends. I opened my mouth to shout over at him when his footing faltered, and everything turns to slow motion. My heart stopped, and I slammed my palm against Brandon's chest knocking him backwards and the wind out of him. As soon as I got to my feet he was gone.  
And then the chaos started.

I watched the second hand tick by on the clock, trying to distract myself from my thoughts. Ten more minutes and Chef would call 'times up' for our quizzes. I had finished. If I was grateful for one thing in the past two months, it was that cooking and learning in this class was the only thing that could actually turn my thoughts off. It is the only grade that has remained constant lately. All my other grades and classes however, were slipping. I couldn't care less. Seven minutes to go and we could work on our projects. I wasn't looking forward to it. Especially since every instant I saw Tynan; I pictured him killing my brother - Over and over again. I hadn't taken one look at him today. But I knew he was there of course. He sat no less than two feet away from me. He set his pencil down a few seconds after I did and flipped his paper over. My eyes had just closed when the corner of a piece of paper touched the side of my palm. Instantly my heart rate picked up and my eyelids flew open. It was a piece of notebook paper and I slid it in front of me. It was a list, in Tynan's loopy script – and they were all desserts. I wouldn't have taken him for the baking or pastry type, these were complicated recipes. I took out my pen and circled three; milk chocolate truffles, Bavarian cream filled Éclairs, and just because it was a little simpler, butterscotch chocolate chip cookies. I slid the list back towards him and felt fingers touch mine before quickly pulling away. _Another rumor crossed off the list… Not as cold as ice. _I smiled to myself. I saw him circle one of my choices but couldn't see which. I looked up to his face and saw his moss green eyes looking back at me, flaring up my face and sending my glance back to the front of the room.

The timer went off and Chef came around to collect our tests. He told us we could start working, and the whole room erupted into noise and voices, some shouting over one another, arguing. I turned in my chair and looked to the list. The cookies were circled, and a small laugh escaped my lips. I slapped a hand over my mouth, and mumbled sorry. He looked down puzzled at the list, folded it and put it in his pocket. "Well," he looked over at my direction but didn't meet my eyes this time, "I thought it would be the quickest. And they last longer than the others in case we get them done faster," it was good thinking, I nodded. His hair was cut shorter, barely below his ears now and you could see his face for the most part.

"Do you want to come over tonight?" His eyes met mine now, and I realized what I had just said, I stammered, "I mean… We can get the… uh…" Tynan just stared at me. I nervously put my hair up in a hair tie, "We can do a prep list or something," my face was red, but he nodded, "Sure that'd be fine. Address? You can just text it to me if you'd like, since you have my number now." The bell rang and he got up before I could reply, leaving the class, and I swear the corner of his mouth turned up.

The great thing about this semester was that I had barely any classes. Only three classes one day, and two the next. History was going to wear me down as my last class before I could leave. Today was culinary and history – not a horrible combination, but I needed to make sure the house was clean before Tynan came over.  
Not that I care what he thinks.  
But maybe I do?  
I rest my head in my hands; _I'm going to be baking cookies… with the Goth kid._

I hauled ass getting home. Gran had texted me after I left for school today saying she wouldn't be home until later and there was dinner in the fridge and dessert on the counter – of course. I really didn't know what I would do without her. I had texted Tynan, giving him my address but he didn't reply. But hey, if he doesn't come… Then he doesn't come.  
I start throwing clothes and random things in the closet and straighten up my room. _Why the hell would he be coming in my room? _Ugh. I feel like I'm going to throw up. He's just a guy – and he's Goth. I'm not attracted to him… right? It's times like these that I wish I had a girl friend that I could talk to when things like this come up. I haven't been particularly close to anyone since middle school, and she moved away. We keep in touch online pretty frequently though. I gossip now and again with girls from school, but I can't remember the last time I had a 'sleep over'. I am fine with it… for the most part. I hear tires crunch on the gravel coming up the dirt road. My grandma lives in the outskirts of town. Farm country… She only has a few horses though, thank God. Her old neighbors used to have cows – it was a grand old time when I was younger waking up to the stink of cow shit in the morning.

By the time the dust and dirt settled, Tynan was getting out of his truck. Which was a surprise to me; I wouldn't have thought him to be a truck kind of guy. I went downstairs and turned the TV on, for some kind of back ground noise. This was going to be awkward as it is, I didn't need it dead silent. He knocked at the door and I walked to it, checking my reflection in the mirror hanging on the wall. I looked fine.  
I opened the door, "Hey Tynan," I smiled and opened the door wider, "Come on in," he gave me a slight smile and a nod and cleared his throat as he stepped through the threshold. I hadn't noticed what he was wearing today until now. Instead of his usual weird-creepy-baggy-chain-linked black pants, he was in a dark wash pair of jeans. Under his usual black bomber looking jacket however, he was wearing a black long sleeved, slight V-necked shirt. He looked almost normal… almost. I tried not to let him see the shiver that passed through me as I clicked the door shut. I don't know why I'm this horribly nervous. He was looking around the house. My grandma put a cabin like feel to it. All my grandpa's kills were hanging on the walls still.

"Can I get you anything to drink? I have water, tea, lemonade... or both tea and lemonade?" I walked quickly into the kitchen and pulled to glasses from the cupboard, and thought to myself, _don't drop them. Quit your hands from shaking!_

"How about both," he replied. He sat down on a barstool at the counter. I just had to focus on not spilling the pitcher of lemonade. _Good, _I smiled to myself; _maybe this won't be so bad._ I turned around, picking up the glasses as I did so. My left hand grabbed air, my forearm pushing the glass over the edge. I don't know why, but I reach for it. Trying to save it before it hit the ground? I'm not sure. Tea, lemonade, and glass went everywhere and my flared up like a tomato. Setting the other glass back on the counter, I started grabbing the bigger pieces. I mumbled a cuss word and another pair of hands was close to mine, helping me clean up. I looked up at him and our eyes met, he smiled genuinely, and a sharp searing pain caused me to look back down at my mess. I had a large gash down the bottom of my palm and part of my wrist, "Stay there," Tynan grabbed some paper towels and I held them across the gash. He pulled a broom out from the pantry and cleaned up the glass that way. I didn't move until he was done cleaning.

"Can I see?" he had his hand out and I put my hand in his. His expression didn't change, "do you have a first aid kit? And tweezers… I'm pretty sure you still have some glass stuck in there." I led him to my grandmother's bathroom, because it was cleaner than mine, and showed him where she kept all of her first aid stuff and got a pair of tweezers. I sat down on the closed toilet and he pulled up a chair from her vanity. I put my arm on the counter, "I'm sorry, this might hurt a little," he cleansed the tweezers with some peroxide and leaned closer to my arm. I bit my lip so I wouldn't gasp from the pain, but it hurt, badly. I jerked my arm back a little and took a sharp breath between my teeth. Tynan's grip tightened around my wrist, "Blakely, please, I'm trying to help you. Can you just not move? Or try not to at least." As if on cue, Echo poked his head around the corner. I had forgotten about him. I called him over and scooped him on my lap and nodded for him to continue. Echo cocked his head at Tynan, watching him take out small shards of glass from my arm. It was still bleeding pretty badly and I buried my face in my puppy's fur.

"There," he said finally, after 15 minutes of me trying not to fidget or deck him in the face, "I'm done. Now I just have to clean it." He had gotten nearly 10 small shards of glass from the cut. I wouldn't have even seen that they were there. Tynan cleaned the cut and put some gauze and a large band aid on it to stop the bleeding. Echo ran ahead down the stairs after we cleaned the bathroom up, "Maybe I picked the wrong partner, you seem a little clumsy Blakely." I thumped him on the back of the head, "We were assigned partners, and you didn't have a choice really." He said nothing, just shrugged his shoulders, which made me smile, and my stomach fill with a thousand butterflies.  
I don't like him.  
At all.  
Nope…  
_…Shit._


	3. Chapter 3

**Woo! Chapter 3! Hope you are enjoying reading as much as I have writing. Get ready for a little romance bloom in the upcoming chapters. If there were a between rated T and M... This would probably be the case... Thanks for the love! I love hearing from everyone!**

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"Well, if you were paying attention in class last time instead of being off in your own little 'Blakely-World', you would have heard that we have three weeks to do this. He miss printed the stupid ass rubrics." We sat in the living room on the floor around my coffee table. Tynan had brought different versions of the cookie recipe with him and they were spread about the room. My brows were turned down and Echo was bouncing about the room. He had taken a particular like to Tynan… Coming over and hopping into his lap so he would scratch behind his ears.

"So we have three weeks… Isn't that Valentine's day?" I counted the weeks in my head, "Yeah," he said, "We could do them into heart shapes or something… But make them big. No little skimpy things," I nodded and calculated out the changes in the measurements. Tynan leaned back on his palms, let his head hang back and stretched his legs out in front of him.  
Damn. The boy definitely worked out often. I could see his sex lines as his shirt inched up from him leaning back… His arms were defined and his legs just _looked _muscular. He sat back up and I closed my jaw that had somehow come open. Yeah, I was gawking alright. How could he hide that God-like body under all those black clothes! Why hadn't I noticed he was so attractive before; strong jawline - a light shadow of facial hair outlining it… and his eyes. They were such a deep gorgeous shade of green. They reminded me of summer.

"Uhm… Blakely?" I was blatantly staring at him. My face scorched and I looked around, grabbing a few papers, "Wait, is there something on my face?" his hand wrapped around his chin feeling for something that didn't belong while looking at me with a small amount of concern.

"No, you're perfect!" I laughed, and then stopped myself, "Wait, I didn't mean like that – but you're not – I'm just going to stop talking now…" I let my hair fall around my face as I looked down to my lap at the recipes in my hand. I heard him chuckle low to himself, and when I peeked back up at his face he was smiling. I wish he would do it more often at school. People wouldn't think he was so strange and reserved.

I wasn't sure what time it was until Gran walked through the mudroom door. Tynan and I had both eaten what she had left for me and were eating raspberry cheesecake as she set her bags down on the dining room table. Now this was tricky. I hadn't imagined he would stay an hour after he arrived… Let alone 10:00pm.

"I thought I heard voices in here," my Gran sounded surprised, not concerned though, "Hello darling, I'm Laura – you can call me Gran though," Tynan shook her hand and introduced himself while I slipped out of the kitchen and let Echo outside to do his duty. I heard them make small talk and I leaned against the counter watching them. Once there was a break in conversation I piped up, "Well it's getting pretty late," I directed my words toward Tynan, and forced a yawn, "I'll walk you out to your truck!" I didn't mean to sound rude, but I'm pretty sure Gran and Tynan both got the hint. They said their goodbyes and she retreated into her room while Tynan gathered his things. I clicked the door shut behind me as we walked outside together. It was cold – no, cold is an understatement. It was freezing and I started shivering nearly as soon as I stepped onto the porch.

"You may want to go inside, probably not the best idea to get sick," he lectured me. I stuck my tongue out at him in response. We watched each other, not saying anything. Our breath was swirling together as we exhaled and he shifted his bag higher up on his shoulder and zipped his jacket. His phone vibrated. Sighing, he pulled it out and studied the screen. "I'll see you tomorrow at school, m'kay?" He hopped off the porch and pulled his keys out of his jeans. "Thanks for today," he waved over his shoulder, "Same time tomorrow?" I was taken aback from the question and stammered, "O-oh," I nodded my head but realized he couldn't see me, "yes, sure! See you! Have a good night."

"Night Blakely – oh and tell your grandmother her cooking is fantastic," he slid into his truck and the roar of his engine blocked any reply I might have said. His door slammed shut and the truck was put into drive. I walked back inside, looking at his taillights and watching as they fade further down the road before I locked the door for the night. I lay in bed for a while just thinking about the past few hours, easily falling asleep with a small smile on my face.

Something was definitely going on with Tynan – not in a bad way. I saw him around school which was odd; he usually avoided people at any cost. The baggy black clothes were gone. No more chains and baggy-gothic black pants. He still wore darker clothes, but something about him attracted my gaze – no, not just me... Other girls turned their heads in awe of the Goth Boy's 'new look'. He walked past them, down the hall, not making eye contact with anyone except for his destination… me. His dark hair fell nicely around his face and he didn't wear his bulky jacket today. Still long sleeves, but it was a tight shirt; nicely outlining his frame and usually-hidden muscles. He was staring at me with a questioning look. I missed something, "What did you say?" I asked. I shut my mouth and nervously pulled my hair over my shoulder and bit the corner of my lip. He seemed amused by this and smiled all the way to his eyes. He let out a small breathy laugh, and my insides melted, "I asked you if you wanted to go to lunch," It seemed as if time had stopped around us, because it seemed like everyone was staring at me – well, us. I didn't like being the center of attention, ever. My face burned red and I stammered, "Right – lunch. Uhm, sure… When?"

"Well I was thinking now… You know, since class just got out and it's time for the lunch break," he was still amused with my stammering-stupidity I'm guessing. Tynan took a half step closer and leaned in a little, "Are you alright Blakely?" I nodded my head slowly, "We're being stared at, by like… half the school," I said this softly under my breath so only he could hear. Bodies were still moving around us, but they looked. A few girls stood around a locker and whispered to each other.

"Yeah," another smile, "I know they are," he stood up straight, winked, took my binder and books and nodded toward the door. I followed him, keeping my head down so I didn't see them watching us as we made our way to the parking lot. I could feel their gazes though.

"I don't like being the center of attention," I caught up to him after we were out the doors. I talked softly, not wanting to draw any more attention to myself than I already was. I regretted not bringing a jacket this morning. My arms wrapped around myself at the bite of the wind chill. It wasn't going to be a usual warmish winter.

"Well," he breathed out, looking down at me. I watch his eyes look from my chin to lips, nose, eyes, to forehead and then back to my eyes. I think my blood was on fire.

"Sometimes it's good to get attention," he then looks back up walking in the direction of his truck, "Take my word for this – slinking around in the background doesn't do any good." His voice dropped towards the end of his advice. How did I find that so sexy? I'll admit it. He was attractive… _Why didn't I find him so before?_ This thought makes me feel vain, and a little guilty. I didn't even notice we were at his truck until he opened the passenger door, set my books down on the floor and smiled genuinely at me. I hadn't realized how tall it was before. It was definitely the wrong day to wear my tight jeans. I grimaced. I wasn't short, but I wasn't that tall and beautiful girl at school. Average height and weight… average, average, average.

Tynan held out his hand and I looked at it and back to his face. He narrowed his eyes questioningly, and I grabbed it as he helped me up. I grabbed onto the 'oh-shit' handle and pulled myself the rest of the way onto the seat. The door shut as I got comfortable and buckled in. Tynan got in and shut the door in one swift practiced motion and started it up. It was weird being in such a large truck – almost indestructible. It was loud, probably a diesel, and drowned out any noise as we drove along the gravel parking lot. I saw my car as we passed it, pointing out how small it looked.

"What do you like to listen to?" He glanced my way as he shifted gears, pulling out into the main road. I wasn't picky when it came to music as long as it wasn't rap or scream-o. I told him this and he let out a small 'ahh…' as he plucked a CD from the case and put it into the CD player. I noticed it was the only non-silver-generic burnable disk in the pouch, a bright purple and pink – colored on with markers. I raised my eyebrows, but didn't say anything. I couldn't remember the last time I listened to a mix CD… I have an adapter for my iPod, which holds every song I've listened to and fallen in love with. The first song began and I felt my face light up with a smile that reached my eyes and I let out a short laugh. Tynan turned the volume up and I closed my eyes and belted out the lyrics. I'd memorized this song like the back of my hand about a year ago when I found it, searching randomly for new music. It is one of those really up-beat-poppy tunes that played on the radio over and over. I sang along loud and obnoxiously to the chorus, and then the music drops out, "at you baaaabbyyyy! So here's my number... oh my god, Tynan!" leaving me beat red. I slap him hard across the arm as he laughs hysterically.

"At least you're not too off key," He winks at me and I cross my arms and scowl.

"I hate you," I'm staring out the window as we pull in front of a small urban building. There's a large pig on the sign.

"Ooooh, really now?" He's laughing as he parks. The place is pretty crowded for a weekday. Tynan gets out of the car and I try pulling on the handle of mine, but it's still locked. Before I can push the unlock switch my door opens. He's standing there, all smiles. I just smirk at him. I step down on the metal truck step and slip. Trying to grab on to something before my face hits the ground, Tynan catches me by the underarms. My body gets pushed against his as he steadies me, his arms now around his waist. I should move away – but I really don't want to. Maybe he didn't feel the same. He moved away towards the door and smiled for me to follow. A wave of sweet and salty savory goodness hit me in a wave as Tynan opened the door for me. Hawaiian food was on the menu today apparently. I felt his hand on my lower back, guiding me towards the counter to order. It was packed, but there wasn't much of a line to order. I started looking at the menu while Tynan talked to the guy behind the counter; asking how his family was and if his brother was still overseas. They knew each other, obviously.

"Lil' Ty'man! I thought I recognized that voice," A dark largely muscular man came from the kitchen and out in front of the counter and pulled Tynan into a hug. They talked for a little bit, mostly about the restaurant while I looked for what sounded good – which turned out to be nearly everything. The man went back into the kitchen, "How do you know these guys?" I whispered to him, curiously.

"My dad owns it," he said it simply, although with a little spite. I decided not to push it and ordered. I settled on shredded pork with their 'special' sauce, mixed veggies and brown rice. I took out my wallet, waiting for my total, which didn't come. The cashier yelled my order to the back and handed me a soda cup and took Tynan's order, which to my surprise was nearly identical to what I ordered. I sat down at in a booth after I got my drink.

"So what do I owe you?" I leafed through my cash as he sat down. He laughed, "Even if it did cost me anything, I wouldn't let you give me any money," he sunk into the booth, "being the owner's son has its perks most of the time." He drank his soda and looked at me, his eyes looking around my face. I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. I had an urge to jump across the table and kiss him. Why couldn't I stop staring at those gorgeous green eyes of his… I wanted him so bad. More than I had wanted anything – but WHY? He was the school's creepy Goth kid. Was it wrong for me to feel like that Our food was set on our table, and we were both pulled out of our little trance – I noticed his face was a little red too. He took a deep breath and thanked the server and started eating. I was starving. And it looked as amazing as it smelt, and tasted a thousand times better. For the moment I forgot all my worries, ate an amazing lunch while catching Tynan attempt to take subtle glances at me. He kept the conversation going all the way up until we both went back to our third hour classes.  
I was in pure bliss.


	4. Chapter 4

**Wow I am so sorry this has taken so long! Sunday's are the easiest days to write! Welllll... here it is! Hope you enjoy! Let me know if so, or not! Thanks!**

* * *

I received a text near the end of fourth hour. After lunch, the day had gone by agonizingly slow. It wasn't a number in my contact list, but I had a hunch to who it was. I felt my heart thud loudly as I read the text, asking if I wanted a ride to his house after school. I was a mess of emotions. I quickly replied back and anxiously tapped my foot until the bell rang. It was Friday and people had parties to go to or places to be. No one stops me in the hallway after school anymore. I've mostly been avoided since Jason left us. My friends stopped calling and texting, and I don't even notice them in the hallway anymore – it doesn't bug me. I hastily grab what I need from my locker and try to look calm as I walk out towards his truck. Tynan is already there, leaned against the hood talking to some of the other Goth kids I've seen him with. I slow my pace, and he looks over at me which sends a huge smile across his face again. The other kids leave as I approach the truck and Tynan opens my door for me again. The butterflies start flying around in my stomach again as we pull out of the parking lot and he puts in the purple and pink CD, "Well, get comfortable," he sighs softly, "There's a reason I don't drive a small car to and from school." There's no awkward silence while we drive to his house. I don't have a curfew as long as I let Gran know approximately the time I'll be home. She's pretty relaxed about letting me go out. I was glad I got comfortable, because it took nearly an hour to get to his house. He lived in the' Uppers'. That's what everyone calls the houses that overlook the ocean on the hill side. They're high enough up that they're surrounded by trees. They're also never sold less than 2.5 million dollars.

I thanked my lucky stars that I didn't get nauseas on twisty roads. The road up to his house was packed gravel and I could see the ocean in glimpses through the trees on either side. There were only twenty houses that were built here so far, but they are gorgeous. Tynan's is near the top and has one of the most beautiful views of the Pacific I have ever seen. His house wasn't as large and show-offish as I thought it would have been. I follow him into the house and get the sudden feeling of homey warmness throughout my body. The house is so quiet I feel like my shoes are slapping loudly on the hardwood. Tynan walked passed me and I followed. We went to the kitchen and I felt my mouth wanting to drop open at the luxurious sight of their kitchen. This had to be my dream kitchen. I know, I probably sound like a culinary geek, but hell, it was loaded. Everything was a mirror shiny black: double door refrigerator, stacked wall oven, granite countertops with a flat top stove… and a built in brick pizza oven. Yeah, I was in kitchen heaven.

"Are you hungry for anything?" He was bent over looking in his fridge, and damn did he have a nice ass, "We have pretty much anything," My feet had slowly started to move towards him on the other side of the kitchen unknowingly, "I'm fine with whatever," I was barely two feet away from him when he turned around and looked down at me, holding two sodas. I don't know what expression I must have been making but he set the drinks down on the counter behind me and bumped the fridge closed with his hip. This moment must have gone in slow motion. I felt like my heart was going to thud right out of my chest and melt right into his arms. Tynan's eyes were locked with mine and they were sensually hooded as he leaned his face down to mine, not leaving my face – well they might have but I wouldn't have known. I closed my eyes and leaned into him and our lips met, sending tingles and warmth throughout places I had completely forgotten about. His lips were soft, and my fingers were warm where he wrapped his own around. He pulled away an inch, leaving a tingling sensation on my mouth. He was smiling as his lips pressed down on mine again. I felt my back press up against the counter and Tynan's fingers lightly fluttered up my arms to my neck and face. Everything about this felt so nice. He was gentle and my heart dropped a little when he pulled away again. His eyes took in every inch of my face with his face so close I could taste the sweet mint flavor of his breath. His thumbs were lightly stroking my cheeks as he whispered soft and meaningfully, "You're beautiful Blakely, you know that, right?" With my name on his lips my cheeks flamed bright red and I was suddenly grateful for the dimmed lights in the kitchen. His lips pressed down on mine again before I had even thought of something to reply with, my arms automatically going up and around his neck. All of him was pressed against me at this point and it still wasn't enough. I couldn't remember the last time I had kissed someone like this, with such compassion and feeling – yet I barely knew anything about him. His hands had moved down to my hips just under the hem of my shirt. His fingers felt cold against my quickly warming bare skin. Our lips were moving together, and he would softly drag his tongue across my bottom lip, making my knees want to go weak. I pushed my hands in the back of his hair and took his lower lip into my mouth, gently sucking on it. I don't remember ever doing this with anyone else or where I had learned it, but it did a little something to him. His hands tightened around my hips as he sighed softly. Our foreheads were leaning against each other's and are both breathing a little more than usual. His hands left my hips and I dropped my hands, slipping my index fingers in each of his front pockets.

"I suggest," he started, his voice sexy and deep, "that the next time you do that," he paused again, placing a feather-light kiss against the corner of my mouth and placed his lips by my ear, "you're ready for what comes afterwards." I felt my pulse in every inch of my body.

"Well, who says that I'm not?" I whispered in the same tone into his ear, my lips brushing against it with each word I spoke. I felt my fingers drop out of his pockets as he pushed himself up from the counter and groaned. He took the sodas in one hand and held out his other for me to take. I didn't care where we were going, if I never had to leave this sexy god-like man for the rest of my life… I'd be perfectly happy.

Tynan's room wasn't what I would have expected it to be. Everything was white and grey – with a couple black pieces here and there. We had gone from the kitchen to a small closet-like door, which led to the basement – which turned out to be his part of the house. He had his own small living room, fully equipped with a nice sized flat screen, glass cabinets full with different movies and video games for his X-Box360, Surround Sound, and upholstered black low couch and gaming chairs. The gaming nerd in me ached to sit and play until I needed to get home. But he showed me around the rest of his little flat. There was a small fridge and popcorn maker behind the couch and his own bathroom off to the side. Like the upstairs, this part of the house was pretty open and spacy. A large aquarium-like fish tank took up most of the wall opposite the bathroom, and I went to look at all the different fish swimming around. They were all very colorful and all different sizes. His bedroom was visible from the living room; the only thing separating the two was a grey curtain that had replaced a door that must have once been there. Tynan had let go of my hand when I went to look at the fish and had disappeared into his room. I walked cautiously past the already pulled back curtain into another wide open space that was his bedroom. His closet light was on and I could hear him shuffling around in there. The walls were a light grey, like the rest of his area down here. An overstuffed black recliner was in the corner next to a hip high, at least ten foot wide bookshelf. The room was organized and clean, and unlike mine, all the drawers of his black wooden dresser were shut with no clothes sticking out of them. In the center of his room, his bed sat, low to the ground and piled with black, white, and grey pillows. I couldn't help myself. I slipped off my shoes, ran, jumped, and back flopped on the bed, landing in the pile of pillows. I was laughing out loud and Tynan stuck his head out from the closet, eyebrows raised. He had to have been shirtless. I reached behind my head and threw a pillow in his direction, but he dodged it. I heard him yell a small "missed!" and I yelled back, "Put some clothes on!" I was still giggling when the pillow I had thrown hit me in the face.

"Hey!" the outburst was muffled by the soft down of the pillows and when I flung it off of my face, still smiling and sat up. Tynan was leaned against the doorway of his closet with his arms folded across his shirtless chest smirking. I felt the smile drop slightly from my face as I quickly took him in. He was toned, and his jeans hung just low enough that his sex lines were perfectly defined. His arms were folded, which showed off his biceps and forearms nicely. I fell back down into the pillows which caved in and covered my face – thank the good lord baby Jesus too, because I couldn't have been redder. I felt the left side of the bed shift as another body sat down on it. A pillow or two was pulled off of my head and Tynan was looking down at me, eyes flicking about my face.

"So much for working on our project," I heard myself say out loud. It came out in a whispered tone and it made him smile. His face leaned closer to mine, and I wanted him to kiss me. I closed my eyes and waited for the pressure of his lips on mine, but felt it on my forehead instead. I wasn't disappointed. I loved the sweet gesture. He didn't pull away at first; just lest his lips rest against my skin.

After a bit, Tynan lies down beside me and folds his hands over his stomach and closes his eyes towards the ceiling. We aren't touching, but I'm watching him. He breathes steadily and I watch his face relax as he lies there, not sleeping but relaxing. I reach my hand up and move some hair aside from his eyes and he catches my wrist. He doesn't open his eyes but entwines my fingers in his, kisses the back of my fingers and lays our hands on the bed in the space between us. I can't figure out why I feel so happy and okay with this. I shouldn't feel happy yet, should I? Especially, not with Tynan… I don't know anything about him, but I'm in his house – in his bed with him, holding hands. It's like he can sense me frowning and he turns over so we're facing each other, our faces only two to three inches apart now. He opens his eyes and looks at me with a mix of worry and confusion, "What's wrong?" his lips tilt slightly downward when I don't answer. I just don't know what to say. He lets go of my hand, and my heart aches, "Do you want me to take you home now?" I close my eyes and breathe out, "It's getting late… I just don't want Gran to worry," Why… why did I just say that. I know she wouldn't care, and she wouldn't ask too many questions even if I had decided to spend the night with this boy – she would just want to make sure I was safe and out of harm's way. But he doesn't know that. Without saying much he slides a sweatshirt over his head and hands me my shoes and another jacket, "It's a little cold out at this time of night," I feel like I should reach out to him, pull him back on the bed and cuddle up next to him, our bodies pressed together, and fall asleep.  
But I don't.

We walk up the stairs and out the door to his truck. He opens and shuts my door open for me again and I quietly sit and put on my belt. He shuts his door, starts up the truck and puts it on defrost to warm up. We sit in silence for a few seconds.

"Did I do something wrong Blakely?" I whip my eyes towards him but he's staring at the steering wheel, and my heart nearly tears out of my chest from the tone of his voice, "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. I wasn't going to do anything – I promise. I knew you weren't ready… I wasn't either, but please, just tell me straight up if I wronged you at any time tonight?" I almost don't even let him get his last words out before I respond, "Tynan, no! You did nothing wrong!" I take his right hand and scoot closer to him on the bench seat. He looks at my mouth, not yet meeting my eyes. I feel my tone get higher as I start to stumble over my words, "I just – I don't know what was wrong with me. I just felt confused… but happy at the same time! I just… I'm sorry, you really didn't do anything wrong, trust me. My mind just goes off on these random rages and how I should be thinking about my brother and how I shouldn't be happy – at least not yet and I'm just so –" I don't get whatever was planning to fly out of my mouth out, because Tynan kisses me. Gentle and surprising at first but then he realizes I'm not going to pull away, so he presses against my lips harder. He wants me I'm guessing as much as I want him because he wraps a hand around the back of my neck and the small of my back as I link my fingers through his soft dark hair.

I start to suck on his lip again and he pulls me onto his lap. My legs are at an awkward angle, so I press him back against the middle of the bench seat and put my legs on either side of him; he moans. He nibbles on my lip and our mouths move in rhythm. My hands slide down his torso and I place them low on his waist under his sweatshirt. I feel him shudder slightly at this and he presses his hands against the pockets of my jeans so our bodies are touching as much that is possible. He moves his hands against my shoulders and pushes off the jacket I had thrown on of his. I slide mine up more on his chest and push off his sweatshirt over his head. His skin was so warm and soft, so I take off my own shirt and press my upper body against his. He groans loudly as I do this and continues to kiss me passionately. I feel his fingers slide under the waist of my jeans and I reach down and unbutton them and then his. I was suddenly thankful I had put on my one cute matching bra and panty set this morning. He starts to pull at my jeans and I move so he can take them all the way off. His are easier and I slide back on his lap as soon as I have them on the floor. We can feel each other through the thinness of the cotton of our undergarments, but I don't plan on going any farther than that. Tynan knows that as well. He moves his lips to my neck and slowly drags his tongue along my jaw line and down to my collar bone. His fingers on in the band of my panties, but don't go any further down – even though I want them to. I kiss the skin right under his ear, as something catches my eye.

Headlights – coming up the drive. My body freezes and Tynan looks at me, "What's going – oh, are you fucking kidding me." I had never heard him cuss like that, but before I know it he pushes me off of him slightly gently… slightly not, turns on the headlights and puts the truck in reverse turning us around. We head for the driveway and the car flashes its bright lights twice and parks next to where we were.

"That was my dad," he tells me while taking a corner a little too fast, still hyped on the adrenaline of almost getting caught.

"Did he see me?" I feel myself sounding alarmed and realize I'm nearly naked and throw on his sweatshirt from the floor. Tynan shakes his head and breathes out, "Do you need to go home now, or can I show you somewhere?" I look over at him and nod still a little shaky, "Okay, sure," He smiles slightly and I move over closer to him on the seat as he takes my hand.


	5. Chapter 5

It was a short drive and even though it was dark, the surroundings started to look familiar. I had handed Tynan his jeans and, with my help, he had them up nearly around his thighs. I was still in only his sweatshirt and bra and underwear, but was too comfortable leaning against his shoulder to move. His headlights swooped over a couple rocks as he parked. I could see a lighthouse lamp turning in the distance, making the water peaks sparkle as the light hit them. I realized where we were.

When my brother's body washed up on the shore later that night of his death, none of us really knew what to do. It was a miracle I could even identify his body it was so mangled. His jacket was torn and his shoes were gone. It was a bloody mess. I was the only one at that point who wasn't crying – my therapist said it was because I was in shock, but I knew I wasn't. The past few months he had gotten into drugs and drinking heavier than he had ever had. He came home one night from a party and knocked himself unconscious trying to walk upstairs. I had to drag him to his room so my parents wouldn't freak out when they woke up in the morning. Things like that started to happen so often that I felt like I should do something so he wouldn't get hurt. So I started going with him when he hung out with his friends or at parties, but promised myself that I would stay aware and sober so I could look out for him… which obviously didn't last long.

Tynan was all smiles showing me his spot. This wasn't his place. Willow peak was my brother's place - his and mine. I threw Tynan's hand away from me and grabbed my pants off the floor pulling them on hastily.

"Why the hell did you bring me here?" I was furious. He looked at me with a confused and hurt expression, "I don't understand Blakely… I – I thought you would love this," I threw open the door and jumped down, stripping off his sweatshirt and throwing it at him. I picked up my t shirt, "Is this some kind of sick joke to you Tynan?" I was screaming near the top of my lungs – not only because I was pissed, but the wind up here was strong this time of year. His mouth was slightly open, but he didn't say anything. I couldn't believe him, "Was this all part of your little _plan_, or something? Hmm? To get me in your house – in your bedroom!" He pushed his door open and came around the front of the truck. He was still shirtless. Behind him the willow tree was bent almost in half because of the wind. I was shaking my head in disbelief and I pointed at his chest, "You changed everything about you; your hair and clothes – just to get me to fall for you? What kind of sick person are you!" My eyes started to water.

"Blakely, I would never -" he reached towards my face and I slapped his hand away.

"You would never what Tynan? You would never purposely bring me to the place where my brother fucking died?" I hated using that word… but I was so angry. I wanted to punch him. So I swung – but he caught by fist right before my fist connected with his jaw and held it there, "Blakely you calm the hell down. How would I know where your brother died? No one let much information out besides that his body washed up on shore!" I didn't answer him, I just glared.

"Trust me; I paid attention when he died. Believe it or not I was pretty close to him in middle school, but you probably don't remember me," I didn't – but I didn't care. He let go of my hand.

"Take me home Tynan. Take me home, now." I said it through grit teeth, looking past him at the tree with my hands shaking. He turned away quickly and got in the truck and slamming his door – but not before yelling towards me again, "I'll take you to the school. You kind of need your car." I couldn't help my cheeks flaring back up in embarrassment and anger. I wanted to fling myself off the cliff. How could one person make me so angry?

I told him we would do the project separately; dividing the work equally, but he didn't say a thing. His eyes were focused on the road and looked like they were watery. I didn't care. With him out of the picture I could focus on school – my grades. I could spend more time with Gran… My puppy was probably missing me. And when we got to the school and as soon as he leaned over me and pushed the door open for me – I lost it. It was raining. I grabbed my bag, slammed the door and broke down into tears right outside my car. He rolled the window down trying to talk to me, "Blakely I'm sorry – please just say something to me, I didn't mean any of it." I shook my head not looking anywhere near him. I needed to get home, and quickly because it was starting to pour. His door slammed and he jogged around the front of his truck. I was still digging in my bag for my keys and Tynan was standing less than a food away. He reached his hand out to me, "What Tynan?" I snapped at him looking him straight in the face. His hair was already soaked, hanging down around his face and his t-shirt was completely wet.

"Just please – Blakely, you know I didn't mean it. You're over reacting, just listen to me," My fist balled up, "Just leave me alone Tynan," I turned and after dropping my keys in the mud twice, I managed to get in a start my car. I slammed my door hard. And as soon as I got home, I grabbed Echo, stripped off my clothes and went straight to bed.

I think I might have paid anything for a sound sleep. But Jason had to interrupt it. He invaded my dreams that night.

It had just started out with me dreaming about Tynan… Things were getting _very_ hot and heavy in his bed - and then I was sitting across from my brother in an ice cream shop. He was smiling like nothing was out of the ordinary. He was eating rocky road, his favorite, out of a cup and was wearing his usual get up; jeans and a t shirt, a green one today – or whatever day this was supposed to be.

"So how has school been going Bay?" That was his pet name for me. I responded like I was having a regular conversation with him, "Fine, I can't stand Ms. Bales' English class though," he nodded and put another spoonful of ice cream in his mouth.

"So you and Tynan are a thing now, hmm?" I nearly choked on what I had in my mouth – he knew about Tynan and me? I must have looked dumbfounded because he continued with a little too loud intake of breath, "I don't like it Bay, something about him isn't right. Promise me you'll stay away, please?" I felt myself snap my mouth shut and narrow my eyes at him, "What does it matter anyway Jason? You're dead." The scene in the shop melted away before he had a chance to reply and I was back in my room, alarm blaring – I had forgotten to turn it off so it didn't wake me up at the crack of dawn. There was no way I would be getting back to sleep anytime soon. I decided to go work out. My grandma had a little work-out room in her house, and I enjoyed using it to take out my anger. Then a long and hot shower, bagel breakfast sandwich and sappy chick flicks for the whole day.

* * *

It was a short drive and even though it was dark, the surroundings started to look familiar. I had handed Tynan his jeans and, with my help, he had them up nearly around his thighs. I was still in only his sweatshirt and bra and underwear, but was too comfortable leaning against his shoulder to move. His headlights swooped over a couple rocks as he parked. I could see a lighthouse lamp turning in the distance, making the water peaks sparkle as the light hit them. I realized where we were.

When my brother's body washed up on the shore later that night of his death, none of us really knew what to do. It was a miracle I could even identify his body it was so mangled. His jacket was torn and his shoes were gone. It was a bloody mess. I was the only one at that point who wasn't crying – my therapist said it was because I was in shock, but I knew I wasn't. The past few months he had gotten into drugs and drinking heavier than he had ever had. He came home one night from a party and knocked himself unconscious trying to walk upstairs. I had to drag him to his room so my parents wouldn't freak out when they woke up in the morning. Things like that started to happen so often that I felt like I should do something so he wouldn't get hurt. So I started going with him when he hung out with his friends or at parties, but promised myself that I would stay aware and sober so I could look out for him… which obviously didn't last long.

Tynan was all smiles showing me his spot. This wasn't his place. Willow peak was my brother's place - his and mine. I threw Tynan's hand away from me and grabbed my pants off the floor pulling them on hastily.

"Why the hell did you bring me here?" I was furious. He looked at me with a confused and hurt expression, "I don't understand Blakely… I – I thought you would love this," I threw open the door and jumped down, stripping off his sweatshirt and throwing it at him. I picked up my t shirt, "Is this some kind of sick joke to you Tynan?" I was screaming near the top of my lungs – not only because I was pissed, but the wind up here was strong this time of year. His mouth was slightly open, but he didn't say anything. I couldn't believe him, "Was this all part of your little _plan_, or something? Hmm? To get me in your house – in your bedroom!" He pushed his door open and came around the front of the truck. He was still shirtless. Behind him the willow tree was bent almost in half because of the wind. I was shaking my head in disbelief and I pointed at his chest, "You changed everything about you; your hair and clothes – just to get me to fall for you? What kind of sick person are you!" My eyes started to water.

"Blakely, I would never -" he reached towards my face and I slapped his hand away.

"You would never what Tynan? You would never purposely bring me to the place where my brother fucking died?" I hated using that word… but I was so angry. I wanted to punch him. So I swung – but he caught by fist right before my fist connected with his jaw and held it there, "Blakely you calm the hell down. How would I know where your brother died? No one let much information out besides that his body washed up on shore!" I didn't answer him, I just glared.

"Trust me; I paid attention when he died. Believe it or not I was pretty close to him in middle school, but you probably don't remember me," I didn't – but I didn't care. He let go of my hand.

"Take me home Tynan. Take me home, now." I said it through grit teeth, looking past him at the tree with my hands shaking. He turned away quickly and got in the truck and slamming his door – but not before yelling towards me again, "I'll take you to the school. You kind of need your car." I couldn't help my cheeks flaring back up in embarrassment and anger. I wanted to fling myself off the cliff. How could one person make me so angry?

I told him we would do the project separately; dividing the work equally, but he didn't say a thing. His eyes were focused on the road and looked like they were watery. I didn't care. With him out of the picture I could focus on school – my grades. I could spend more time with Gran… My puppy was probably missing me. And when we got to the school and as soon as he leaned over me and pushed the door open for me – I lost it. It was raining. I grabbed my bag, slammed the door and broke down into tears right outside my car. He rolled the window down trying to talk to me, "Blakely I'm sorry – please just say something to me, I didn't mean any of it." I shook my head not looking anywhere near him. I needed to get home, and quickly because it was starting to pour. His door slammed and he jogged around the front of his truck. I was still digging in my bag for my keys and Tynan was standing less than a food away. He reached his hand out to me, "What Tynan?" I snapped at him looking him straight in the face. His hair was already soaked, hanging down around his face and his t-shirt was completely wet.

"Just please – Blakely, you know I didn't mean it. You're over reacting, just listen to me," My fist balled up, "Just leave me alone Tynan," I turned and after dropping my keys in the mud twice, I managed to get in a start my car. I slammed my door hard. And as soon as I got home, I grabbed Echo, stripped off my clothes and went straight to bed.

I think I might have paid anything for a sound sleep. But Jason had to interrupt it. He invaded my dreams that night.

It had just started out with me dreaming about Tynan… Things were getting _very_ hot and heavy in his bed - and then I was sitting across from my brother in an ice cream shop. He was smiling like nothing was out of the ordinary. He was eating rocky road, his favorite, out of a cup and was wearing his usual get up; jeans and a t shirt, a green one today – or whatever day this was supposed to be.

"So how has school been going Bay?" That was his pet name for me. I responded like I was having a regular conversation with him, "Fine, I can't stand Ms. Bales' English class though," he nodded and put another spoonful of ice cream in his mouth.

"So you and Tynan are a thing now, hmm?" I nearly choked on what I had in my mouth – he knew about Tynan and me? I must have looked dumbfounded because he continued with a little too loud intake of breath, "I don't like it Bay, something about him isn't right. Promise me you'll stay away, please?" I felt myself snap my mouth shut and narrow my eyes at him, "What does it matter anyway Jason? You're dead." The scene in the shop melted away before he had a chance to reply and I was back in my room, alarm blaring – I had forgotten to turn it off so it didn't wake me up at the crack of dawn. There was no way I would be getting back to sleep anytime soon. I decided to go work out. My grandma had a little work-out room in her house, and I enjoyed using it to take out my anger. Then a long and hot shower, bagel breakfast sandwich and sappy chick flicks for the whole day.

* * *

**Hey guys! Thanks for reading! I would really appreciate it if you let me know what you're thinking so far - suggestions on where their relationship should go... more lovey scenes... less lovey scenes... anything and i'll PM you back! Thanks so much!**

**/Elaine**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hey you all (: thank you so much for reading! Get ready for a little heart tugging emotions… And I know it's taken me like…. For ever to write this…. What can I say? I've been lazy haha and busy! But I hope you enjoy the chapter! **

**p.s. please please PLEASE let me know what you think?! **

**Lots of love!**

**Elaine **

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The clock struck 7 o'clock in the evening. I had just started another movie – this one was an action film though. I needed to change it up a bit. Gran had gone to a craft fair or something out of town and would be back tomorrow night. It left me two days alone to do what I pleased… Thank the good lord for Netflix and popcorn, right? Honestly, the movies were supposed to be a distraction from everything in my life –but they were useless. The popcorn sat untouched along with the unopened half gallon of fruit punch on the coffee table and the little white and buttery yellow puffs of popcorn sat there looking sad, and the punch had left a condensation puddle around the base of the jug… I didn't even remember when I had made it and when I ever bought fruit punch. All I could think about was Tynan's beautiful and sorrow filled face after I left him yesterday when I pealed out from the parking lot leaving him there soaking wet and staring after he damn well deserved it. But did he really? This is how the rest of my day went. Arguing with myself and contemplating my actions. I felt pathetic. I had gone through nearly an entire box of tissues between crying for my brother, my parents, myself and finally Tynan. I cried hot, angry, miserable, loving, and wanting tears for him. My heart hurt – that's the only way I could explain it to myself. I have had bad break ups, but none of them felt like this. I felt like I was going to puke right then and there. So I curled up on the couch with the beginning of the movie starting. I decided to sleep down here for the night.

Jason popped into my head – the dream I had last night still haunted me. What did my brother have against Tynan that I would need to stay away from him? He wasn't dangerous – he might look the part but he was the complete opposite. To me anyway… I laid there, flipping through memories or rumors I may have heard about him in the past years – and I couldn't think of one that was logical. They were all myths – except for the one that he assaulted some girl after a freshman dance, but that was a lie too, I remember my brother talking about it with our parents. It was also the year Jason had stopped hanging out with him and he changed his look… got into the wrong crowd with the wrong people. It was weird that he had been in my life before, but I hadn't noticed him again until he sat beside me in class.

I was completely lost in my own thoughts, and then I looked at the dinging dinosaur age grandfather clock that stood beside our TV set. It rang the two low and long rings that meant it was fifteen minutes until 8 o'clock. It was like it was pity mourning for me. _Great,_ I thought half sarcastically; _even the clock thinks I'm pathetic. And since when do I talk to clocks? _I literally had to roll my eyes at myself. I sat up slowly and picked up the tissues that scattered the floor, couch, and coffee table around me. Jesus I was a slob. I dumped them into the garbage can before I dragged myself upstairs to get my pillow, slippers and favorite blanket. Without thinking, I checked my phone - and noticed I had 17 missed calls and 19 new texts… 20 now as it popped up as I lit up the screen. No one ever called me – or texted me as much as there were messages in my inbox. Panic filled my stomach at the possibilities and I almost threw up – but my stomach was empty. But as I checked who they were from… they were all from Tynan. All of them.

Honestly – what could he have possibly wanted? I threw the phone back on my bed angry, but somewhere inside I felt wanted again. I picked it up again. I bit my lip; I was curious, he was thinking about me. Sitting down on the floor against the wall I scrolled through all of them. Most said around the same thing – that he was sorry and wanted to make things right. And towards the newer ones is when my heart started to pound, and then the doorbell rang. He had called and texted saying he was coming over because he was worried about me that I wasn't picking up and would be here by 8 – and now he's here. He was worried about me? He still wanted me back?

I somehow made it to the front door but I couldn't make my hand move towards the knob. I was frozen, but managed to look at myself in the entry wall mirror that has been there since I can remember. I realized how distraught and horribly un-kept I looked. Then again I hadn't been doing jack-shit all day. I had been feeling guiltier beyond belief about everything I had said to him. But he still shouldn't have taken me to Willow Peak. His fist knocking on the door for the 7th time (I had counted) brought me back to the reality that I was just standing there. Only a 3 inch slab of wood keeping us apart.

"Blake, I hope you're in there – please, just open up… I really need to talk to you," he sounded panic stricken and my heart swelled. No matter how much I wanted to make myself hate him – I couldn't. I had been feeling guiltier beyond belief about everything I had said to him. But he still shouldn't have taken me to Willow Peak… But it was Tynan. He really didn't know any of the details of Jason's death. _Just man up, tell him you're sorry and take him back,_ I thought bravely. I mouthed my words, practicing exactly what I was going to say and opened the door before I changed my mind.

I wasn't sure if it was a good idea or not.

Time had frozen. Tynan was standing there in the bitter freezing cold in all black. No color or his new clothing choices – it was back to his old brooding look. It was like a black and white scene from a movie; him in all black and snow falling down behind him in a blizzard-like condition. He looked like an entirely different person, but his eyes were glued somberly to my mine. And before I knew it my face was cradled between his hands and his lips were crushed on top of mine. I felt my whole body go into shock as time resumed itself and I closed my eyes.

It was a good idea - a very good idea that I opened the door.

A feeling of instinct mixed with longing kicked in and I wrapped my arms around his neck. It was strange kissing his darkened clothed self – but it was still him. My Tynan – I could feel him moving underneath my hands. Well so much for apologizing. Jason's face jumped into my mind again – but I shoved the image away. He was wrong. Tynan would never hurt me. He kicked the door shut behind him, still glued to me. I threw off his long black trench coat to the floor and shoved my fingers in his hair. It seemed like an eternity since I had seen and felt him. All my bitter emotions disappeared and I could feel my eyes tear up from happy feelings this time. Though I didn't think I had any more tears to cry, but didn't care. I didn't think about anything except for Tynan – him now pressing me against the wall beside the mirror and trying to get as less of space as possible between the two of us. His right hand moved down my body lightly and wrapped around the outside of my thigh, pulling it up and around his side. His legs were between mine now and I could feel that this was affecting him as much it was me. Our bodies were pressed so close together I was surprised we weren't fused by now. His warm hands slid under my light sweat shirt I had thrown on this morning over my sports bra. His fingers felt cool against my now heated skin and he skillfully removed the jacket over my head and threw it aside. I arched my neck up and his lips placed feather-light kisses along my collarbone and up my neck to my jaw.

I felt my way along the hem of his shirt and the cold of my hands made him jump slightly, which made me let out a breathy laugh, as I touched his toned middle. I skimmed them upward, feeling my way up his smooth god-like chest. He stopped kissing me then, and we just watched each other. My hands were still under his shirt, now at his shoulders. Tynan's eyes flicked to my lips and he let out a slow breath, trying to calm himself. I didn't let him. I flipped his shirt over his head and leaned in; kissing him along his jaw line and down to the hollow base of his neck and I felt him moan softly. His hands gripped under my legs and hoisted me up, but not before throwing down my sweat pants. Now this wasn't fair, he had me nearly naked – and he still had pants on. I giggled to myself and he started moving. Where the hell was he taking me?

I didn't think much of it. My lips still molded to his as he successfully, and without any effort it seemed, moved us to the couch. He softly let me down onto it first, and I pulled him down on top wrapping my arms around his waist and kissing him once before I pulled away. His head rested against my forehead and I cleared my throat, "Hey," I said, simply. This put a small, sad smile on his face and he traced my lips with his finger.

"Hi, Blakely," my name rolled off his tongue like silk as he whispered, and my insides warmed up like the way sunshine does to your skin on cooler days. His thumb stroked my blush reddened cheeks and he placed a light kiss on my nose.

"Blakely, I -"

"Tynan, you -"

We spoke at the same time and let out a breath as we interrupted each other. He didn't let me continue though, putting a finger to my lips, "Blakely," he started again, closing his eyes this time. I noticed he had a little liner or something on his eyes – where the hell had he been? "I am so sorry I took you there yesterday…" It had been only yesterday? It seemed like an eternity ago! He opened his eyes again, they looked a little bluish today, "If I only knew that – that it had been your and Jay's place – you have to believe I would _never_," I placed my small hand over his lips, hearing Jason's old nickname sent a pang through my body. I hadn't heard it in years. I breathed in and out slowly, trying not to cry again. Tynan's eyes shimmered – they were slightly watery. He moved my hand from his mouth and took both of mine in both of his between our chests, "I would never, _ever_, do that to you purposely. You have to believe me Blakely. I could never do that to the girl I lo-" My eyes widened and I smile tugged on the corners of my lips and heart, but he caught himself though I wish he hadn't, "to you Blakely. I care about you so much," his words came out in a rush and I saw his cheeks turn a little red.

He kissed my hand letting his lips rest against my skin for a while. I realized I had little clothing on – but hey, who cares at this point, "I care about you too Tynan, a lot," I hoped that was the right thing to say. And it seemed that it was because his smile reached the corners of his eyes and it made my heart swell.

"And I'm sorry, too Ty. I really shouldn't have done that to you. After everything you've done for me – I really can't think of anyone else I'd rather be with." He placed a sweet drawn out kiss on my lips, "I forgive you Blakely, always," he whispered on my mouth after pulling away. It sent shivers through my body. He had almost said he loved me – or maybe I imagined it. His head tucked into my shoulder and mine in his and we lay there together for a while.

"So I have a question," I started off softly, and he just hmm'ed in reply making the side of my shoulder his head rested on vibrate. Our hands were locked together and our fingers were playing with one another's. He rubbed my palm softly with his thumb, sending unexpected tingles everywhere.

"Why… do you have make-up on?" He lifted his head and cocked it at me, confused. I touched his eyes and a light bulb clicked inside his brain, "Ah, well actually, I was hoping," he paused, conflicted with his thoughts, "I have a friend who is throwing a get together tonight… It's kind of a big deal and I wanted you to go with me," He smiled hopefully as he read the expression on my face. He's asking me to a Goth party? I must have looked confused and freaked out because his expression saddened. I shook my head clear, "Well, what should I wear?" He was all smiles again and I smiled back, glad he was happy.

This would be an interesting night.

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**A/N: Also! If there are any creative people out there reading and might have some kick A ideas for a cover for this story I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR/SEE THEM! Throw me a message and whatnot! Thanks you beautiful people you!**


	7. Chapter 7

**This chapter goes out to Anonymous259! You really need to get an account so I can PM you! Haha (: Thought since I got a lot of positive feedback on the last chapter… I'd upload another before I hit the sack! Hope it's worth it! **

**Love your feedback!**

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I stared at myself in complete shock and awe in the full length mirror on my closet door. I think if my mouth fell open any further; it would've hit the floor. I was not staring back at myself – I was a completely other person. A set of hands wrapped low around my waist, and now Tynan was in the mirror reflection with me. We looked like a Goth couple ripped out of some magazine or something… did they have those? I was dressed in a short black dress that hugged all of my curves. It would have been sleeveless and low cut if not for the sheer lace that covered from my wrists to my shoulders, neck to the sweetheart neckline. My strawberry blonde hair had darkened because of the season, so it was redder than normal. I had braided it back loosely and tied it with a small deep purple bow - it fell to the middle of my back with little wisps falling around my face. Tynan and I looked up dozens of pictures of how to do my eyes up and one thing was a constant – heavy black eye make-up. So there I stood, staring at my face and the heavy liner and smoldering dark eye-shadow colors. My lips were a dark purple and I kept my face clear of any make-up and color because it was un-needed… I have always been pale. Some old tattered vintage looking combat boots completed my look, with fishnets of course.

And curious yet to where this outfit came from? I wish I could say Tynan had bought it for me, wrapped it in all black and creepy looking paper… maybe hoping I would take him back and greedily accept the invitation to this Goth-get-together… But no – actually, it came from my Gran's closet. I had ripped my drawers and closet apart while Tynan sat on my bed, waiting for me to find something. The closest thing I had was a long black suit I wore to my brother's funeral… and I didn't want to put that on ever again. I wondered to myself why I still even had it. But I needed to find something to wear. I didn't think I would find anything in my Gran's closet but low and behold there it was – still in a plastic dress cover in the back of her closet behind the rest of her dresses. I didn't even want to know why she had it – but hey, it was something that looked like would be appropriate for the occasion. Seeing Tynan's reaction when I showed it to him told me I was 100% correct. He stood wide eyed when I had slipped it on and for the first time in a long time, he was speechless. I felt like I was on cloud nine.

The fishnets and combat boots were mine, and I would probably have to buy some more eyeliner the next time I was out. I looked at Tynan in our reflection as we stood there together and he kissed my neck softly. He had spiked his hair all to one side so it looked like there was an airplane jet blowing his hair dry in that direction. He was back in his shirt and trench coat, which made me a little bummed – he was so amazingly good looking.

"We should probably get going," Tynan whispered in my ear, getting my heart thumping faster. I was getting excited – it was going to be a good night.

He didn't have his truck tonight, but an older dark mustang that I hadn't seen before. I locked up the house and tucked my keys and phone in an old chain link clutch I bought in middle school. It tied together my look nicely. My door was opened for me and I got in, buckling the belt right away. I was bouncing in my seat with excitement and Tynan laughed at me as he got in.

"You're first Goth party Blakely?" he laughed as he asked me this. But then reality set in and my face got serious, "Well actually I haven't ever been to a party for myself… It was always for Jay. Watching out for him I mean." I don't think I had ever told anyone that – but there it was, out in the open for interpretation and Tynan just put the car in reverse, "You are amazing, you know that?" He didn't even look at me as he took my hand is his and drove down the gravel-dirt road. I didn't feel sad bringing up Jason, especially to Tynan. How had I become so close to him so fast? I was all smiles, and kept glancing at him, trying to see if we were close to our destination or not.

I think I may have dozed off a couple times. Between the sounds of the engine, Tynan singing along with some band I had never heard of, and him rubbing the back of my hand with his thumb I had become suddenly tired. Then again I had had an emotional day… with all the crying and Tynan being lovey and whatnot. I became fully alert again when I felt the car park, and I looked around at our surroundings. I didn't understand what was going on, and looked to Ty for clarification. We were in the old industrial district of the city, and I started to panic a little – there have never been any good stories that have come out of this area. I slowly unhooked my seat belt.

"Okay so I want to make sure you're completely safe tonight, ok Blay?" the nickname was silly, but I still blushed that he had given me a name no one else had ever used. I nodded, still a little confused.

"Tonight you take nothing, and I mean _nothing_ that anyone offers you – well aside from me of course," he smirked and I just smiled, letting out a small giggle.

"If anyone gives you a hard time you come to me okay? I'll try to stay glued to your side, but it's going to be packed. But just in case we do get separated…" he tapped my clutch on my lap, "you do have your phone right?" I nodded profusely and Tynan smiled and pushed open the driver side door.

"Wait where are we -" I was cut off as he shut his door, walked around and opened mine. I looked up to his model like shadowed face "…going?" I was pulled out of the car with a stupid smile plastered on my face.

"Come on, you don't wanna miss all the fun do you?" he locked the car behind us and we took off, briskly walking. He may have been the giddiest most excited Goth I had ever met – kind of like a kid in a candy store… but darker, and kind of creepy… I shook the thought out of my head as we approached an old boarded up warehouse. I didn't ask any questions, and as we approached the building I could feel my whole body start thumping – and it wasn't because of the feelings Tynan and I. It was sound waves hitting us from inside the building and I hadn't heard the strange music for another ten or fifteen steps. As we reached the metal large door it opened.

Three dark clothed girls and one tall male fell out of the door all laughing hysterically. Their eyes were huge and they reeked of weed, liquor and sex. I never really knew what people meant when they said that, but standing here with them blocking our entrance I understood immediately. They were all hanging over each other, and suddenly the tall guy slapped something in Tynan's hand, "Hey maaaannn," he had a deep voice and it slurred as he tried to get his words out, "I haven't – you weren't – where have you been Ty-rannosaurus Rex?" I held my laughter from the stupidity. The girls were standing behind him, running their hands over him, and each other obviously not caring about us standing there. One of the girls actually eyed my outfit, licking her lips. I looked away, strangely flattered and feeling awkward. The vibe was already getting to me.

"Around Mackle," Tynan nodded towards the girls, "You might wanna get them home soon – and safe," he was being Mr. Responsible – my heart swelled at the sweet gesture, I squeezed his hand.

"Awe man, I'll get them home – they're always safe with me," he winked creepily at me, but I thought nothing of it. They were all drunk and high and I'd been in worse situations… Tynan nodded and said his goodbye's to the group of… friends… with benefits? Most likely – but I didn't want to know for sure. They walked away and Tynan opened his hand looking at the clear plastic bag of 4 lime green and hot pink pills. He opened the bag and for a second I thought he was going to take them. Instead he dropped them on the ground and crushed them with his boot deep into the gravel. He stuffed the baggie in one of his many pant pockets and I gave him a questioning look. He answered with one word not meeting my eyes, "Ecstasy," I stood wide eyed and looked behind us at the group of stumbling loud teens. They weren't only high on pot, but ecstasy too? Sweet Jesus, interesting wouldn't even cover the word to describe the night ahead of me. And that was obvious as soon as we walked in the door. It was incredible. And completely terrifying.

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**Thanks for reading! Didja like it? Hmmmm? Hmmmm? Let me know! And I'm still lookin' for a cover idea! ;) thanks y'all.**


	8. Chapter 8

**I would crazy love it if you guys reviewed some of my chapters! :) It would totally make my day! And make uploads faster if I know that you guys are actually interested in the story… Hope you're enjoying it! Now… read! :D**

Within the first five minutes of walking through that metal door I had been offered four drinks that were different neon colors and several packets of the crazy colored pills. Tynan ignored them all, putting his hand up to block them off and ushering me more towards the warehouse center. Without the strobe lights flinging about the entire room it would have been completely dark. I was grabbed and had hands run over my body as I walked through the crowd. This normally would have bothered me, but the vibe of the rave was intense; the music was threatening to burst my eardrums but my insides seemed to love the beat of the different tones of the music vibrating through my entire body. I hadn't ever felt like this before – and I really hadn't ever gone to a party like this either. The ones I had been to were quaint with people I had met before and my brother had known for years. Never more than 20 to 30 people – unlike this place where there had to be at least 400 people. They were all dressed in black with splashes of colors. I saw a few girls and guys dressed in all white scattered around the room, but they still had the same dark style make-up and stand-on-end hairstyles. I'd have to give them credit – Goths knew how to throw a party.

We were in the center of the floor and I was still gawking at everything around me when Tynan slipped his hands around my middle from behind. His hands moved right below my bra line and slowly slid their way down my front. My heart picked up, more than it had already. Every hormone in my body was lit and flowing easily. Tynan's hands were now on my hips and were gently putting pressure on them moving my body to the beats of the electronic movement. I hadn't realized we were actually dancing. It was a different kind of dancing rather than what I had done at school dances and such. It wasn't even considered grinding... His hands drifted down and were now resting on the sides of my thighs pressing me into him. I had been lightly holding his arms, just following where his hands wandered about my body – but now I put them up and behind me so they were linked behind my head. I think if we weren't in a public place we would have been ripping one another's dark clothes off and getting a little intimate. Tynan must have been thinking along the same lines because his head leaned down and traced his tongue down the side of my neck.

Wow. That sparked a few things deep inside of me so I turned around to face him. His eyes were lidded heavy and I could see a few glimmers of sweat dotting his neck. It _was _hot in here… I didn't really care to notice at the moment because he was looking at my lips hungrily. Ah, so we were thinking the same thoughts. I felt my eyes wandering from the rim of his shirt around his neck and then up, all around his face, and finally back to his eyes. We were standing still in the middle of the warehouse floor and probably both contemplating to rip off each other's clothes. And possibly one of us might have if it wasn't for the change in the song. A hardcore metal-ish one – and the entire crowd turned into a giant mosh pit. Everyone was jumping and we were pushed out of our intimate moment and pushed together and against everyone else. His front was against my back again. All hands were up in the air, mine included. It was such a cool feeling being in the middle of this. Why hadn't I gone to one of these this sooner? I was having the time of my life right now.

But then I realized where Tynan's hands were – not up in the air like mine and everyone's – but slowly sliding their way up the sides of my thighs, poking under the edge of my dress. I didn't stop him; it's not like anybody would be paying attention anyway, it was too dark. His fingers found the top of my fishnets and he slid his hands inside and hooked his thumbs around the band of my underwear, a thong of course. The rest of his hand rested towards the front of my body, like when someone holds onto belt loops on their pants. His pointer finger was tracing circles on my skin where my hip joint would connect to my pelvis. It was weird how my body reacted so quickly to his simple touches. I had never had sex before… I hadn't actually have done much… I've gotten to 'second base' with a boy (you know, the handsy stuff – not third base, which is mouthy… and home base… you know… like sex – well not 'like' sex – it is sex). Nope – haven't had sex with a guy yet. I used to think that it was pathetic and I just needed to get it over with. I could have just done it with one of my brother's friends even. But then I read some fact somewhere that girls release some 'obsessive-like' hormone when having sex with a guy that they never even release until they bond with their kids… which makes sense when girls can't really ever _just be friends_ with a guy and have sex.

Anyway, I hadn't ever had a guy to anything to me. I gave a guy a hand-job once at some stupid party last year, and then blabbed to my brother's friend about it – they made a bet. Mature, right? Jason was pissed – and I felt him creep back into the corner of my mind. I thought about what he would think if he saw me right now here with Tynan. What he would say if he noticed Tynan's hand sliding further downward, and noticed that I was enjoying myself a lot more than I probably should have? I leaned back into Ty, arching my back slightly. I felt him kiss my shoulder and laugh slightly. He was just teasing me… He wouldn't actually do anything in public, even though he very well could right now – I mean his hand was practically all the way down there anyway. He turned me around by my hips so I was facing him again and he pulled me toward the side of the crowd. There was a bartender at the side of the building mixing drinks and I saw a couple of girls walking away with the neon colored drinks. One of them shot a look at Tynan – obviously checking him out, and winked at him. He didn't even seem to notice as we walked by them and she brushed her hand a little too close to his already 'excited' body part. What a _bitch!_ My mind became filled of jealous thoughts and I thought about ways that I could take her down. Tynan was looking at me, amusedly confused and started laughing when I met his gaze. Was I really _that_ easy to read?

"Do you want something to drink Blay?" he had to shout so I could hear him over the music though we were so far away from the nearest speaker. I had to seriously contemplate it before I nodded hesitantly.

"Sure… but nothing too strong," I pleaded, "I want to remember _most _of whatever trouble we get in tonight," He smiled, winked, and talked to the bartender over the counter. I looked around, with his hand still attached to mine of course. It was crazy packed inside, and even if I tried I don't think I would ever be able to remember who was who – everyone looked so alike with the style choices. I turned back around to Tynan handing me a teal blue drink in a black solo cup – fitting, no? We locked eyes as I sipped it, and I was amazed at the flavor. It tasted like a blue raspberry sucker or snow cone or something. And I smiled as I brought the cup down and noticed it was already half gone. Wow, whatever it was it wasn't _that_ weak. I already felt a little something going on up in my head, but the drink was amazing! I tilted the rest of the cup up and felt the bright drink slide down my throat like silk. I crushed the cup, laughing, and tossed it in a nearby garbage can. I wrapped myself around Ty, nearly spilling his bright orange drink that I didn't notice he had in his hand.

"Whoops," I giggled out like a little girl, "Come ooonnn, dance with me!" I felt light, carefree, and I wanted Tynan touching me again. I pulled on his belt loops, tugging him toward the dance floor and he downed the rest of his drink and tossed the cup aside. I normally would have yelled at him to pick the cup from the ground – but tonight wasn't a normal night, and all I cared about right this instant was my body and Tynan's grinding together on the dance floor. I wanted him _so_ bad.

**Thanks for reading! And remember to review! Or comment/PM me! Or add to your favorites list! Or all three! Haha I really do appreciate all you guys reading! It makes me feel like I actually have a chance as becoming a writer someday maybe… After Pastry school of course! ;D **

**Loves, **

**Elaine!**


	9. Chapter 9

**I would crazy love it if you guys commented on some of my chapters! :) It would totally make my day! And make uploads faster if I know that you guys are actually interested in the story… Hope you're enjoying it! Now… read! :D**

Within the first five minutes of walking through that metal door I had been offered four drinks that were different neon colors and several packets of the crazy colored pills. Tynan ignored them all, putting his hand up to block them off and ushering me more towards the warehouse center. Without the strobe lights flinging about the entire room it would have been completely dark. I was grabbed and had hands run over my body as I walked through the crowd. This normally would have bothered me, but the vibe of the rave was intense; the music was threatening to burst my eardrums but my insides seemed to love the beat of the different tones of the music vibrating through my entire body. I hadn't ever felt like this before – and I really hadn't ever gone to a party like this either. The ones I had been to were quaint with people I had met before and my brother had known for years. Never more than 20 to 30 people – unlike this place where there had to be at least 400 people. They were all dressed in black with splashes of colors. I saw a few girls and guys dressed in all white scattered around the room, but they still had the same dark style make-up and stand-on-end hairstyles. I'd have to give them credit – Goths knew how to throw a party.

We were in the center of the floor and I was still gawking at everything around me when Tynan slipped his hands around my middle from behind. His hands moved right below my bra line and slowly slid their way down my front. My heart picked up, more than it had already. Every hormone in my body was lit and flowing easily. Tynan's hands were now on my hips and were gently putting pressure on them moving my body to the beats of the electronic movement. I hadn't realized we were actually dancing. It was a different kind of dancing rather than what I had done at school dances and such. It wasn't even considered grinding... His hands drifted down and were now resting on the sides of my thighs pressing me into him. I had been lightly holding his arms, just following where his hands wandered about my body – but now I put them up and behind me so they were linked behind my head. I think if we weren't in a public place we would have been ripping one another's dark clothes off and getting a little intimate. Tynan must have been thinking along the same lines because his head leaned down and traced his tongue down the side of my neck.

Wow. That sparked a few things deep inside of me so I turned around to face him. His eyes were lidded heavy and I could see a few glimmers of sweat dotting his neck. It _was _hot in here… I didn't really care to notice at the moment because he was looking at my lips hungrily. Ah, so we were thinking the same thoughts. I felt my eyes wandering from the rim of his shirt around his neck and then up, all around his face, and finally back to his eyes. We were standing still in the middle of the warehouse floor and probably both contemplating to rip off each other's clothes. And possibly one of us might have if it wasn't for the change in the song. A hardcore metal-ish one – and the entire crowd turned into a giant mosh pit. Everyone was jumping and we were pushed out of our intimate moment and pushed together and against everyone else. His front was against my back again. All hands were up in the air, mine included. It was such a cool feeling being in the middle of this. Why hadn't I gone to one of these this sooner? I was having the time of my life right now.

But then I realized where Tynan's hands were – not up in the air like mine and everyone's – but slowly sliding their way up the sides of my thighs, poking under the edge of my dress. I didn't stop him; it's not like anybody would be paying attention anyway, it was too dark. His fingers found the top of my fishnets and he slid his hands inside and hooked his thumbs around the band of my underwear, a thong of course. The rest of his hand rested towards the front of my body, like when someone holds onto belt loops on their pants. His pointer finger was tracing circles on my skin where my hip joint would connect to my pelvis. It was weird how my body reacted so quickly to his simple touches. I had never had sex before… I hadn't actually have done much… I've gotten to 'second base' with a boy (you know, the handsy stuff – not third base, which is mouthy… and home base… you know… like sex – well not 'like' sex – it is sex). Nope – haven't had sex with a guy yet. I used to think that it was pathetic and I just needed to get it over with. I could have just done it with one of my brother's friends even. But then I read some fact somewhere that girls release some 'obsessive-like' hormone when having sex with a guy that they never even release until they bond with their kids… which makes sense when girls can't really ever _just be friends_ with a guy and have sex.

Anyway, I hadn't ever had a guy to anything to me. I gave a guy a hand-job once at some stupid party last year, and then blabbed to my brother's friend about it – they made a bet. Mature, right? Jason was pissed – and I felt him creep back into the corner of my mind. I thought about what he would think if he saw me right now here with Tynan. What he would say if he noticed Tynan's hand sliding further downward, and noticed that I was enjoying myself a lot more than I probably should have? I leaned back into Ty, arching my back slightly. I felt him kiss my shoulder and laugh slightly. He was just teasing me… He wouldn't actually do anything in public, even though he very well could right now – I mean his hand was practically all the way down there anyway. He turned me around by my hips so I was facing him again and he pulled me toward the side of the crowd. There was a bartender at the side of the building mixing drinks and I saw a couple of girls walking away with the neon colored drinks. One of them shot a look at Tynan – obviously checking him out, and winked at him. He didn't even seem to notice as we walked by them and she brushed her hand a little too close to his already 'excited' body part. What a _bitch!_ My mind became filled of jealous thoughts and I thought about ways that I could take her down. Tynan was looking at me, amusedly confused and started laughing when I met his gaze. Was I really _that_ easy to read?

"Do you want something to drink Blay?" he had to shout so I could hear him over the music though we were so far away from the nearest speaker. I had to seriously contemplate it before I nodded hesitantly.

"Sure… but nothing too strong," I pleaded, "I want to remember _most _of whatever trouble we get in tonight," He smiled, winked, and talked to the bartender over the counter. I looked around, with his hand still attached to mine of course. It was crazy packed inside, and even if I tried I don't think I would ever be able to remember who was who – everyone looked so alike with the style choices. I turned back around to Tynan handing me a teal blue drink in a black solo cup – fitting, no? We locked eyes as I sipped it, and I was amazed at the flavor. It tasted like a blue raspberry sucker or snow cone or something. And I smiled as I brought the cup down and noticed it was already half gone. Wow, whatever it was it wasn't _that_ weak. I already felt a little something going on up in my head, but the drink was amazing! I tilted the rest of the cup up and felt the bright drink slide down my throat like silk. I crushed the cup, laughing, and tossed it in a nearby garbage can. I wrapped myself around Ty, nearly spilling his bright orange drink that I didn't notice he had in his hand.

"Whoops," I giggled out like a little girl, "Come ooonnn, dance with me!" I felt light, carefree, and I wanted Tynan touching me again. I pulled on his belt loops, tugging him toward the dance floor and he downed the rest of his drink and tossed the cup aside. I normally would have yelled at him to pick the cup from the ground – but tonight wasn't a normal night, and all I cared about right this instant was my body and Tynan's grinding together on the dance floor. I wanted him _so_ bad.


	10. Chapter 10

***Tynan***

I had to practically drag Blakely out of the rave… If I hadn't, I was worried we may have ended up in the middle of the floor doing things we should never do in public… It was that bad. We were both high just from the second hand smoke but I could control myself better than she could. She was using my arms to try and prop herself up as she walked but it was no use. I scooped her up in my arms and she whined.

"Tynan, we don't have to leave! I was just starting to have fun… where's my drink?" She was also drunk off her mind. Her hands took ahold of the sides of my face placing slightly messy kisses everywhere except for my lips. It was kind of cute besides the fact she reeked of alcohol.

"Just wait until we get to the car will you?" I teased her and she nestled her face in my chest. I was more than sober enough to drive both of us home. I hoped she would fall asleep before I had to put her in the car, but it was no use. As I set her in her seat she tried to get back out and ended up face down in the dirt. She started laughing hysterically and I started to get a little uneasy… This part of town _wasn't _safe…

"Come on Blay, we need to get you home…"

"Fuck you," she was still laughing and was now drawing swirly patterns in the dirt, "I don't want to go _home._ I want to stay with you," she drunkenly pointed at me and her words were completely slurred. I kneeled down to her level and she fisted my shirt in her hand.

"I just really need someone to cuddle with right now… This bed is too cold Ty…" And she was whining again. This was the first and last time I would ever take her to something like this…

"Blakely," I sighed, "You're on the ground laying in dirt at night… It's going to be cold," I picked her up again and put her in the car. Her hands trailed over the back of my legs as I leaned over her to buckle her in, and then she bit down hard on my shoulder. I jerked back, slamming my head on the roof of the car.

"Fuck, Blake…" She was pouting now like a child, hands clasped in her lap with tears welling up in her eyes. I rubbed my shoulder as I activated the child lock on her door so she couldn't open it from the inside.

I needed to get her home… It was almost one in the morning and I just used the last of my energy getting her in the car… I needed some sleep. I had turned the music on and Blakely was amusingly trying to hum along.

"Tynan," she sang my name terribly, "I have a question," she placed her finger to her lips, tapping.

"Okay… What is it?" She then turned in her seat and put her face very close to mine. Her head cocked to the side, and then to the other as if she was studying me intently.

"Are you…" she whispered, "a vampire?" she took a sharp intake of breath and placed her hands over her mouth. I swerved slightly at the ridiculous accusation and looked at her wide eyed.

"It makes so much sense… Is it hard to get ready if you can't see yourself in the mirror?" I held back a laugh and smiled at her.

"You are so drunk, you won't even remember a thing in the morning," I shook my head and she trailed her finger down the side of my face.

"I am not the one who is _drunk_ sir…" she removed her black painted finger and sat back in the seat.

"Eh… I beg to differ…"

"You don't need to beg darling… I'm more than willing." Blakely, in her drunken teased state, laid a hand on my thigh. I pressed on the gas pedal… We were so close to my house. She needed to go to sleep. Her hand moved slowly and higher up on my leg. I wanted her so bad…

But not like this…

"Blakely, stop it." I sounded stern and pushed her hand away. She pouted and folded her arms across her chest.

"You don't have to be such an ass you know. I'm just trying to have fun." I sighed but said nothing else.

By the time I had parked behind my truck she was passed out, breathing deeply. Dad was gone again on business… I didn't know when he would be back. My feet crunched against the gravel driveway as I walked over to the passenger side door. Wolves started howling in the east and I could hear the ocean clearly.

I wish she was sober enough that we could just lie on the hood of my car and look at the stars together… this night could have gone so much better.

I carried her through the threshold and down to my room. She even woke up enough so she could help me change her out of her dark clothes and into a deep blue t shirt and flannel pants of mine. I focused on getting her dressed, and nothing else... Her makeup was smeared under her eyes and I helped her clean off her face and put up her hair, and by the time I removed the warm cloth from her face she was sound asleep on my lap. I tossed her clothes and shoes by my closet door.

She was tucked into my bed after I placed a lingering kiss on her forehead. I also decided to stack some pillows on the side closest to the edge of where she was laying so she didn't fall off. I knew I was being more than cautious. I changed out of my clothes finally and got ready for bed. I decided I would let her sleep in my bed alone and grabbed a couple blankets from the top of my closet and made a bed on the floor next to where she was sleeping.

"Sweet dreams Blakely," even though she was sleeping and didn't hear me, I fell asleep right afterwards knowing she was sleeping safe a few feet from me.

I could smell something… Bacon and cinnamon rolls. The breakfast my dad cooked whenever he came back from one of his trips. I rubbed my knotted back and stretched. I hated sleeping on the floor. I glanced over to my bed and saw a lumped form of a body still under the covers. It sent a smile across my face.

I climbed over to her sleeping form after returning from the bathroom. She had tucked herself into the comforter so much that her face wasn't even showing.

"Good morning princess," I reached for the blanket and pulled it back revealing nothing but a feather down pillow. My heart stopped and I jumped off the bed. I peeled the comforter off my bed showing the sleeping form of stacked pillows which I thought was Blakely.

I quickly walked from the room to upstairs where the smell of breakfast was now making me sick to my stomach. She wasn't anywhere downstairs.

"'Morning Ty," My dad greeted me with a tired and warm smile.

"Have you seen Blakely?" I realized I was still in just my boxer briefs.

"Who?" My dad took a long draw on his coffee and continued to flip the bacon, "You had a girl over last night?" His eyebrow was raised in question.

"Yeah. I did. Don't worry, nothing happened," I called from the entry way. The door was locked and through the windows I could see all cars were here.

"It doesn't look like it from the looks of what you're wearing son…" I ignored my dad's accusations and sprinted up the steps to the upper level of the house. All of the rooms up here were wide and open. She wasn't in any of them.

"Maybe she called for a ride home?" Dad suggested as I padded back into the kitchen.

"No... She would've left a note…" I ran back down the stairs to my room and looked around. Her clothes and shoes were still in a heap next to my closet door. None of my shoes were missing either. Her purse was kicked slightly under the bed from where she had dropped it the night before and I saw her phone light up. I picked it up and a reminder flashed at me on the screen, a reminder set for her to call her aunt because it was her birthday. She never would leave without her wallet or her phone.

My stomach was now in my throat and I felt like I was going to throw up.

She was gone.

***Blakely***

I was sitting on a milk crate I think. My bottom half was going numb – so were my fingers I noticed. I think I was in some type of shed. I could smell sawdust, gasoline – maybe from a lawn mower? It was musty, and extremely dark – not that the blindfold was helping much. Even though they were covered, my eyes filled with tears and my heart swelled.

My head was pounding from my hangover, but it also felt damp like I had been bleeding. It was so cold, and I felt my body trying to fall back to sleep. I dug my toes into the ground, which was what felt like dirt or sand. I felt like I was hyperventilating.

I calmed my body down. Digging my toes deeper into the ground I took 5 deep breaths. I tried figuring out what I remembered happening before waking up here. Slowly backtracking in my memory I found myself staring at myself in the mirror wearing all black. Tynan was standing behind me.

Tynan… Where was he now? My pulse started racing again and I realized I had stopped breathing. I forced myself again to take deep breaths.

In and out…

And again… and again.

We went to the rave… We drank, danced and I remember being carried into his house, and getting dressed into his clothes.

There had to be something after that… I think I may have fallen asleep. I moved my leg back and forth feeling flannel pants move against my legs. They had to have been Tynan's. I thought back to laying soundly in his bed… And then I remembered him telling me "Sweet dreams," but his voice sounded like he was far away.

I needed him here. I needed him to find me, wherever he was now.


	11. Chapter 11

**Well that took longer than expected to upload... But HEY! I'm out of school and can write whenever I wanna! :) Follow, Comment, etc... Thanks lovelys... and don't cry.**

***Tynan***

I could call her Grandma, but I was almost certain that she wouldn't be there. I picked up the phone pressing 9-1-1.

"What the hell do you think you're doing Tynan?" I dropped the phone, causing the battery and back of my phone to fall off. He seemed to come out of nowhere, and the more I looked at him the more hung over and exhausted he looked.

"Shit, Dad, what do you think I was doing? I'm calling the police – unless you know where she is." He gave me a blank stare, causing an uneasy feeling to creep through my throat.

"_Do_ you know where she is?" My father stared unblinking into my eyes, "No, I don't," he firmly answered me and stared me down. I broke our eye contact and turned around headed toward the front door.

My knees buckled under me and the entry way rug rushed toward my face. My ears rang loudly and it felt like something in the back of my brain exploded. Something dropped beside me and thumped against my arm.

As I lay on the floor I could see through my quickly fading vision my dad walking quickly toward the back door, lighting up a cigarette.

***Blakely***

My entire body was feeling week, like I just needed to take a long nap. Part of my brain wouldn't let me fall asleep though, maybe because I subconsciously thought I was going to die if I did. Maybe if I just closed my eyes for a little bit, time would pass and Tynan would be here rescuing me like my knight in shining armor on his white horse.

I closed my eyes and tried to picture him like that. His suit would be a dark shining black though – his horse would be black too. He would rip off that door and take my face in his big warm and soft hands and kiss me. I could imagine his face full of concern and happiness that he found me… how he smelled like – cigarettes?

No, my Tynan smelled like spice and winter – and sometimes laundry softener.

I gasped as I opened my eyes to rays of sunlight where the door had been just seconds before I had closed my eyes. A tall figure stood in the doorway and my heart instantly warmed.

"Tynan," my voice sounded terrible. It was raspy – I hadn't noticed how dry my mouth was. My lips cracked as I said his name and I tasted a little blood as I ran my tongue over them trying to moisten them as best I could.

"Nope," the voice was much deeper than Tynan's. The warmth of my heart turned to ice faster than it had warmed. It crept through my veins and I felt like I was frozen. I could barely breathe.

The man stepped forward toward me, tossing his cigarette stub behind him. I had never seen him before, but something about his face was familiar to me. I sat as still as I could as he reached behind me. I heard a switchblade open and my hands came loose. He had dark short cut hair, and if it weren't for the situation I was in at the moment, I probably would've thought he was attractive for a middle aged man.

He smelled like cigarettes, whiskey, and bacon? There was something sweet too. My stomach lurched a little – I was so hungry, but the smell of cigarettes and whiskey was making me queasy.

"Get up," I followed his order and grabbed onto his arm to steady my wobbly legs. All the blood had rushed to them from sitting for God knows how long. He grabbed a large handful of hair at base of my neck and pushed me forward out of the shed. I was in Tynan's backyard… which meant that this man was his father…The same man who Tynan had spoken so negatively of, and seemed to have some type of hatred for him. It had to be him – he looked so familiar to me because Tynan (whether he liked it or not) got quite a few physical traits from him.

Where the hell could he be? Why wasn't he trying to find me?

I started tearing up – from the pain of his father's grip on my hair and the thought that I might never see him again. I stumbled bare footed across the sharp gravel drive way toward his father's car.

"Get in. Don't even think about trying to jump out. It's child locked."

I just did as he said. All of the crime shows I had ever watched seemed to end badly because the victim said or did something the bad guy didn't like.

I couldn't believe I was basing my decisions off television. Honestly, I was too exhausted to do anything. I think if I even tried to open the door, my movements would be so slow Tynan's dad could stop me before my hands even left my lap.

We were driving faster than I had ever gone, taking corners at nearly 50 miles an hour. I didn't even want to make the motion of buckling my seat belt. I was trying to sit still as my body slid left and right at every curve. It was a short drive, but as we were coming closer to the destination, tears streamed down my face.

Tynan's dad parked haphazardly on the green grass and came around to my side of the car.

"Don't try anything stupid," he hissed as he pulled me out of my seat. We walked toward the side of the cliff and he pushed me to the edge and stepped back. My toes hung over the very spot my brother plummeted to his death. I looked over my left shoulder at the large tree swaying in the wind. Somehow, just seeing that tree, gave me a little hope. And a little bravery.

"Can I ask you why you're doing this? And where is Tynan?" I didn't look at him. I looked straight ahead of me at the horizon. It was a gorgeous day out already.

"No, you can't," dammit, I asked the wrong question. I didn't have to look back to see that it was a gun he was holding. I heard him cock it back, "And Tynan obviously doesn't actually care about you; otherwise wouldn't he be here?" I choked back a sob. He was lying – I knew he was.

_I love you Tynan._ I hoped somehow he heard me, even though I said it in my head.

"Now jump, or I'll help you," I felt the cold metal barrel press into the back of my neck, "Either way you're going the same way your brother did."

Tears were streaming down my face again – I don't remember if they had ever stopped or not. I wasn't ready to die.

I just wasn't.

But I took one step forward and wrapped my left arm around my stomach. And the other pinched my nose shut. My hair blew out behind and above me and the sharp rocks and water rushed toward my quickly dropping body.

My last thought was of Jason, and I'm glad I was going to be able to see him again.


End file.
